A few weeks later, I took myself to the doctor (10 am appointment) and they recommended an EKG test, as dizziness such as this can be related to the heart. They didn’t have an EKG machine at this particular location, so they sent me downtown to another office. After a long concerning wait in the lobby, the assistant calls me back and hooks me up to the machine. This was my first EKG experience; so I had no idea what to expect. The nice thing about the testing machine is it provides instantaneous results… however, the doctor’s busy schedule kept me waiting in anticipation for about 20 minutes. Lying there on the cold vinyl exam bed with nothing but a paper nightgown on, the only thing I could do to remain calm was practice meditation. I imagined myself in Fort Brag California, sitting on the rugged coast line, listening to the gulls, and watching the waves break against the abrupt, moss-covered cliffs.
Finally, the doctor knocks on the door and I spring awake, quickly regaining consciousness and remembering where I was and why I was there. “I don’t want to jump to conclusions,” he starts out, “but your test results came back abnormal and I recommend you go to the ER to get a blood test to check for heart markers.” What!? There’s nothing wrong with my heart! I explained my story. “Well, there’s a chance nothing is wrong, but it would ruin your day and mine if we neglect to prevent a potentially serious condition.” I guess that’s the job of a doctor… no, not to scare the hell out of you, but to prevent the worst-case scenario. Certain there was nothing wrong with my heart, I called Wilson and had him drive me to the ER at St. Thomas Hospital. Yes, the “what-if” factor got me.
Driving to the hospital, I remembered my last visit to the ER as a little girl for some odd respiratory dysfunction. My mom told me, “think of it as an adventure, babes.” These words echo in my head often, but they were particularly loud in this moment in time. Nothing to be afraid of, just think of it as an adventure!
"Think of it as an adventure, babes"
When I got to my room, I put on my nightgown (cotton this time, thank goodness) and climbed into bed. My fist request for the nurse was to shut off the TV as I didn’t need to see a murder movie flash in my face or hear lies in commercials about the health benefits of corn oil. About 30 minutes later, a guy comes in with scrubs and a large machine. “I’m here to do an X-ray of your heart shadow.” What!? An X-ray!? My primary concern here was not the condition of my heart, but the hospital bill I was racking up! How the hell am I going to pay for all this? I don’t have insurance! That alone will give me a heart attack! Thirty minutes after the X-ray, I get my first blood draw. They would take two samples, a baseline reading, wait 90 minutes, and take another sample. If there were no changes, everything checks out and I can go home. I made small talk with all the nurses and text everyone important in my life about what was going on, with a “Guess where I am ;-)” type of attitude. I passed the time with more meditation and pod casts by Tara Broch. Meditation and my coconut water were the best medicine that I could have asked for at the time, so I felt lucky. The meditation eased my body and mind, the coconut water maintained my blood sugar, and the inability not to rest was in a way, very therapeutic. The only down side was every time I had to get up and pee, I had to call a nurse to disconnect me from all the cords and wires that monitored my vitals. I felt a little like Frankenstein.
The meditation eased my body and mind, the coconut water maintained my blood sugar, and the inability not to rest was in a way, very therapeutic.
Update: I started some chiropractic adjustments and lo-and-behold, the dis-equilibrium has improved dramatically. It creeps back in every so often, but to a much lesser degree. I have another idea of what it could be… mold.